Finish Him… But Keep it Retro

Ah, Mortal Kombat. Few games better represent a mis-spent youth and pocket money well spent.

In my younger days I spent many hours hanging out at the arcade, hoping to witness a glorious, gory fatality. Watching the talented few who actually knew what they were doing was a rite of passage. But me? I was more of a fanboy with a notepad.

In fact, MKII was technically my first business venture. A local game shop had printed a cheap fatality guide, and I—being the industrious little venturer I was—bought a copy and spent typing class painstakingly copying character one-sheets. I sold them for a cheeky can of Coke or a bag of crisps. Capitalism at its most exploitative.

Fast-forward 30 years, and I’ve got my own arcade machine at home—grown-up money meets childhood dreams.

So now I need to make a choice: which Mortal Kombat is my Mortal Kombat?

Naturally, my first instinct was to return to the original, undisputed arcade greats. But what about the games I missed?

There’s MK4. But the shift to 3D brought us blocky polygons, and it just didn’t corrupt young minds in the same way those digitised sprites did when they were being ripped in half.

Then we have the console ports. The purist in me clutched his imaginary arcade stick and muttered, “Not my Mortal Kombat.” Console sell-outs! I stuck my nose in the air while secretly sneaking in a few rounds on the PS2.

I’ll admit—Deadly Alliance, Deception, and Armageddon had their place. They actually killed Liu Kang? That was the kind of bold storytelling I could respect.

Then came Mortal Kombat (2011)—the ninth game, and a full reboot of the series. I remember thinking: Timeline reboot? Revisionist history? Colour me bloody interested! I love a good narrative reset almost as much as a gratuitous spine-rip.

But life also got in the way, and I didn’t actually play MK9 until almost a decade later. When I finally did, I was both impressed… and traumatised. The story was good—a proper love letter to longtime fans. But the difficulty was brutal. It was as if the game wanted me to start feeding my PS3 actual coins just to get through the final chapters.

That said, I finished it. Bloodied, blistered, and possibly dehydrated—but victorious.

After grinding through 9’s campaign, I pivoted to Mortal Kombat X (or XL, as I snagged it on a cheeky Steam sale). This one? It moves. The combat is fast, fluid, and responsive. It runs beautifully on the arcade, and the controls actually acknowledge that I have human thumbs.

And then there’s XL's roster... Jason, Predator, Alien?! These were the monsters I used to hide behind the couch from. And now you want me to play as them?

At this point, NetherRealm’s just mocking me. MKX has become my current go-to—it’s a glorious blend of old-school brutality and modern polish.

But wait—there’s more.

Mortal Kombat 11. Word is it’s MKX turned up to, well… 11. Visually stunning, mechanically refined, and once again, absolutely stacked with nostalgia-bait.

Rambo? Robocop? Terminator?! What is this, my VHS line-up from the mid-90s? If X was teasing me with horror icons, MK11’s gone full blockbuster. It’s like Ed Boon broke into my teenage brain and decided to make a roster out of everything I wasn’t old enough to see in the cinema.

And let’s not forget that MK11 also introduced a time travel storyline. Past vs present. Alternate timelines. Fatalities across the multiverse. If MK9 cracked open the narrative door, MK11 kicked it off the hinges.

Most recently, there’s Mortal Kombat 1—the reboot of the reboot. Honestly, it looks gorgeous. Visceral visuals so realistic, you can practically feel the bone marrow splatter on your face. A total refresh that brings back all the legends, polished to perfection and ready to throw hands.

So where does that leave me?

The truth is… I want them all.

If I had my way, I’d run X, 11, and MK1 simultaneously on separate cabinets. A glorious, gore-soaked shrine to digital violence.

I floated that idea past Mrs Moobs.

She said no.

So I’m doing it my way.

Here’s the final lineup for the arcade:

• Mortal Kombat, for nostalgia.
• Mortal Kombat II, because if you were there, then you know. It was the peak.
• Ultimate MK3, because it added everyone on the roster.
• Mortal Kombat X, for that modern edge. It’s fast and fluid, and I still haven’t finished the story—it’s my personal mission.
• MK11 will follow once I’m done with X.
• And when the time comes, I'll add MK1—though by then I’ll probably need to consider active cooling just to keep the arcade running.

Let’s face it: some men build home gyms.
I build Kombat cabinets.

No regrets.